Let's face it, most people want an amicable divorce, but only few actually get one. One might say that it's the nature of the beast, or as I am often heard to say, merely an extension of what went on during the marriage. In other words, if there wasn't trust in the marriage, you shouldn't expect it in the divorce. If there wasn't understanding in the marriage, you shouldn't expect it in the divorce. If there wasn't communication in the marriage, you shouldn't expect it in the divorce. Therefore, for the majority of people going through a divorce, getting real and getting ready means the following:
1. Get a Journal. You need to keep a journal of all your spouse's comings and goings. Likewise, keep track of where you are and what you have been doing. Very often people make accusations about each other that can not be substantiated. Keeping a journal or calendar will help.
2. Keep Track of The Mail. You can't open anyone's mail except your own. No exceptions. You can however be observant and keep track of the things that come in the mail. You will find that the things that used to come to the house may no longer be going there.
3. Call Your Accountant. Your accountant will be one of the first people involved in your case. Give him or her the heads up that the divorce is coming. Find out how he/she feels about continuing to represent you or your spouse.
4. Change your Voicemail and Email Passwords. Even if it is illegal for your spouse to obtain this type of information through certain acts, it will still give him or her the information that could still be used to his or her advantage without you knowing the source.
5. Get a Therapist. Your money is extremely valuable and should not be spent talking to your lawyer about anything except information that he or she needs about the case and to protect you.
